The MST Dungeon
Welcome, gentle visitor!
...to the hideous recesses of the MST Dungeon. Here you will find some fiction of the purple, offensive, or just plain bad caliber--all mocked in the style of Mystery Science Theater 3000. I have sorted the stories by fandom. The lengths of the summaries next to the chapter links are roughly proportional to the length of the chapter. The rule of thumb is the longer the summary, the longer the chapter.
The MST marked with a [new] is the most recent update.
- Harry Potter
- The Second Malfoy Child (taken down)
- Taken down. /crai. Here is the author's email if you're curious.
- Fire Hearted Prophecy (in progress)
- Chapter 1 - An extremely OOC Bellatrix, Lucius, and Snape go to the Potter house the night they are due to be Voldemort'd. They rescue Harry and Lina when they could have rescued all the Potters. Special baby Lina kills Voldemort with lasers. Plot holes and unanswered questions abound.
- Eragon
- Black Rose, Red Thorn (completed 8/23/2008)
- Chapter 1 - A flashback tells us about five-year-old Vihrea Nightshade, who is a wolf-thing something of the moon goddess. Galby adopts her.
- Chapter 2 - Thirteen years later, Vihrea gets a dragon and will probably become a Rider. The readers have difficulty sympathizing with her.
- Chapter 3 - Vihrea thinks about confusing things. There is sexual tension as Murtagh and Vihrea play with their swords.
- Chapter 4 - Meanwhile, Vihrea's younger sister Vasha demonstrates her ability to remember things from when she was presumably three years old.
- Chapter 5 - Vasha visits a Wiccan lady and asks her to send something to Vihrea.
- Chapter 6 - Vihrea is riding around on her new dragon, and she meets up with a wolfman. She has anger management issues.
- Chapter 7 - She turns into a wolf. Absolutely no one is surprised about this. Murtagh sees her naked and furry.
- Chapter 8 - Vihrea explains to Murtagh how special and powerful she is. She leaves, and there's a cliffhanger.
- Chapter 9 - Vihrea was one terrible princess if their king is to be believed. Vasha and Mairda the Wicca Lady plan to find her.
- Chapter 10 - Vasha and Mairda come find Vihrea. Murtagh and Vihrea share an intimate moment, at least until Vasha shows up.
- Chapter 11 - There is talking, talking, and even more talking. Galbatorix is a roadblock.
- Chapter 12 - Vihrea, Murtagh, Vasha, and Mairda go back to the wolfland. There is talking, and the story ends at last.
- Sailormoon
- Sailor Moon: American Kitsune (in progress)
- Chapter 1 - Sailor Moon falls out of the sky and David Kintobor Crockett Gonterman Foxfire (I don't know) catches her.
- Chapter 2 - David and Edward take Sailor Moon to Ed's house and David shows off his plasma rifle. References to Hiroshima abound.
- Chapter 3 - In this chapter: overly long running gag, Sailor Moon and David go to dinner, and more racial insensitivity happens.
- Chapter 4 - Sailor Moon and David fight a thing. Or...several things. I don't know, I don't care, this story is stupid.
- Chapter 5 - Ultra Wangst Special Episode! Everyone wangsts! There is implied sex, Serena thinks David is hot in briefs, and Luna appears.
- Chapter 6 - Edward Becerra picks up the Sailor Senshi. The story begins to make even less sense and Gonterman takes potshots at Mystery Science Theater fans.
- Chapter 7 - Incest. Need I say more? Please don't make me say more.
- Chapter 8 - Some kind of fox-woman rewrites time and David ends up in the Sailor Moon mythos. He also rants about gays and is generally angry. [new]
- Kingdom Hearts
- Dead Red Day (completed 1/17/2009)
- One-Shot - Yuffie is a goth now. Amy Lee appears in a radio. Then Yuffie dies.
- MST Dungeon Specials
- Silk and Steel (completed 3/17/2009)
- Excerpt - The longest, strangest, most purple description of a fairy/elf/whatever princess ever written. And if it isn't, it's certainly in the top five.
- Shall We Dream? (completed 3/27/2009)
- Chapter 1 - Draco is the prince of some islands or something. Harry is the prince of some other islands. Hermione is a water nymph. Never updated again.
The formatting for these fics was blatantly stolen from the Eye of Argon MST by Adam Cadre. Inspiration came from Usenet, MST3k, MSTron, TV Tropes, The MSTing Mine, Something Awful, Deleterius, Pottersues, Fandom Wank, Cracked, The Gonterman Shrine, and pop culture, along with a heaping helping of nostalgia for old-timey internet...
MSTings were written by Kitty Eulalia, who only owns the Dungeon test subjects (Cookie, Levi, Malachi) and any doodles of them that may be lying around.
You can go here to learn more about the site and/or read my disclaimer. Either one is fine.
Last update: 6:08 PM 9/13/2009
Contact: shinyplastickitty@gmail.com